My brother George has been hounding me to join an IG live session on fatherhood.
He says it’s Father’s Day on Sunday and as such we should engage on the topic
He now wants to bring a lady with very conservative ideas on the issue
I really do not want to be part of it, but I had not honoured George’s invitation to his mother’s birthday recently due to clashing schedules, so this is an opportunity to make amends.
But tarry, I have a new idea of what a father is.
I had first noticed from some of my Yoruba friends who would buy the most expensive lace for the latest Owambe but would not send their children to good schools
Others leave the kids’ training to their wives while enjoying their lives, spraying money and following all the wriggling bottoms on the dance floors.
In the long run, both the ‘I don’t care fathers and the fathers who slave for the children and family are treated the same – ignored, abandoned and scorned.
Many fathers today are living in regret of a life’ wasted’ taking care of the family.
An older friend died on his kitchen stool with a cup of coffee living alone with his kids and wife gallivanting around the world
Another plagued by prostate issues and blind, died alone in his house on his bed with his family living in Europe
The stories abound and will even be boring repeating them here, so I will spare you guys.
Just as we now have evolving motherhood and all sorts of stupid labels for stupid, ungrateful and entitled kids like Gen Z, Millennials, etc, fathers must now start evolving too.
We must rebrand, recreate our terms of engagement and build very solid buffers between us and these ‘people’
Once we hit 40 our ethos, outlook and engagement must gradually begin to morph towards ‘me’.
You must start learning how to put yourself first in every decision.
Your health, Finance and lifestyle must begin to have you as core.
Every Naira must first embellish you and what is remaining can now be used for philanthropic pursuit towards your family
Enough of the sad stories. We must now begin to be like those old men in Ikoyi club who have lived well, prepared for their old age and just lounge at that Golf section and be exchanging stories of their conquest – since dts all they can do now with their weak erections
That is how me I want to be. I want to be like those Ikoyi club golf course old men.
I don’t want to spend all my youthful years running around, spending, pushing to give the family a good life only to be told later – you were never there
A lot of men have been hung with the – you were never there label as a justification for abandonement which has led to an increasing mortality rate and debilitating mental health crises amongst men above 50
As Father’s day approaches, I besiege all Fathers to look inwards, pamper yourselves, think of yourselves and bless yourselves
It is the age of the selfish. Be selfsih once you are above 50, think self do whatever makes you happy
Get drunk, marry that new wife, tour the world, get a chef, go to Akwa Ibom and indulge, do whatever makes you happy cos if you dont, nobody will.
You must realise that you are being used by your wife and kids and you are as relevant as your value remains.
The moment you pass your sell by date, you will turn into a relic and abandoned
Very few escape this. Very few will be cared for into their old age, very few would enjoy the fruits of their labour.
My people, that number is so little that i cannot advise anybody to take the risk of hoping he would belong to that rarefied class and this is why I find it very reluctant to join George’s talk on Fathers day cos when i drop this my latest theory, his guest, the lady would wince.
Truth? Fathers be selfish. Period
Come and beat me, thank you
Duke of Shomolu