Eniola is my young investment banking star who is the apple of my eye
The other day, I heard him on the phone. Emem, I need you to…
I want you to… As I listened, I knew Emem would not answer him.
At the tail end of the call, I heard Emem say to him, What is all this need to and want to
I smiled and told him that he had lost the first rule in influencing people
To be a good networker and Influencer in Corporate Nigeria, never be caught dead talking down on people.
Words like Need, want, must, come here, etc should be very scarce in your vocabulary.
Even if you are Mike Adenuga, don’t try it otherwise you would be digging your grave cos you would be building an army of employees instead of an army of visionary co-travellers
In my over 30 years in the sales space, I have learned that the easiest way to influence people and get them to work for you is to show respect. Sincere respect
I have found out that words like – kindly, if you don’t mind, God bless u, can you possibly, thank you so much are passwords to closing sales or building enduring relationships
As you grow higher in rank and status, those words become very powerful weapons.
As a very close friend of Otunba Bimbo Ashiru who is Chairman of Odua, I go to visit him at work regularly
Before I get there, he would have informed them that I was coming
Now imagine me work in there and tell his support staff to – get me that charger or I need you to inform the Chairman that I am around
I will get my bidding no doubt but be very sure that my file wont move fast and that I wont get anything extra that is not within the procedure and if by any stroke of Ill luck, i enter trouble, I am on my own
Now juxtapose this with how I treat Dr Ebose’s staff. Dr Ebose is MD of Anchor Insurance
Obama how are you this morning and this your suit is sharp bro. Obama is his EA and when that one offers me a drink, i say ohh thanks so so much Obama you are a great guy.
Then Austin says, go to Nelson I have aporoved your sponsorship and I walk into Nelsons office and say – Bro how madam, I saw u the other day at the event, I think you do such a nice job branding your firm
Then I will go – Bro no vex o but Austin says I shd ask if you have possibly processed my payments
Then he says yes oo Duke and I say ohh thank you so so much, I am indeed too grateful.
If you dont mind. Cn I possibly ask how much was approved? And my brother i beg you is it possible I get payment today?
He will say Aghhh Edgar our procedure ooo. Ok make I see what i can do, lets go to Tayo
And I go to Tayo and hug him and say wow, I havent seen u in a bit. I just want to thank you so much for all your support cos i knw that without you i no go get Anchor.
We both know that I will get Anchor with or without him but his contribution in fast tracking is just as important as almost the approval and even if its not, I still must get him on my side
There is something called Influencing up which is influencing those in superior authority to you and influencing down those obviously below you in status.
Its still the same tactics you use. Still those same words
Thank you, God bless you, you hsve been so kind, may I, could you, i appreciate you…
Have you noticed, that i call almost everybody – My Lord?
That works like juju as it massages the ego, messes you up by tickling you like a baby and prepares you to be sold
Influencing in Sales is truly a very simple thing to do once you get used to words that massage, elevate, push sincerity while eshewing words that appear condescending and rude
Thanks
Joseph Edgar is working on the iconic Maddtimes power list Coffee table book
Last modified: June 20, 2025
