As I was scrolling down IG, I stumbled on a post by an Abuja comedian, and it was on one of my favourite people – Femi Otedola
It was on the messaging between Femi and his daughter, DJ Cuppy
At first, I didn’t get to where the Comedian was going with it, but something asked me to watch till the end
Apparently, it was DJ Cuppy’s birthday, and the father put in a call, but she did not pick up
A few hours later, he did a video call, and she still didn’t pick up
Then he sent a text – ohh just to wish you a happy birthday
Nine hours later, the next day precisely, she responded – ‘Dad, you know that house in St. John…’
And he replied, ‘What about it?’
And she replied, ‘Since it’s my birthday, can you change the ownership to me?’
And he responded by dropping an emoji of himself with his hands on his head
Now I was waiting for the comedian to lampoon Femi, but instead he went philosophical, which I loved
Did you see the patience? He asked. Did you see how he never shouted – I have been trying to call you, but you didn’t answer. Is something wrong with your head?
But instead, his love and extreme patience came out, according to the comedian
Kai, Mr Otedola’s love for his children, especially DJ Cuppy, has been well documented publicly
From ice cream jaunts to Italy, to different dancing skits, to too much love and affection in mutual rations, Mr Otedola has shown continuous love for his children
In fact, I had once been warned by one of his very close handlers never to carry fight towards his children if you don’t want to see his red eyes
Anyways, my take from all of this is how I would have responded if my daughter didn’t take my calls for 9 hours and returned with the request DJ Cuppy came with
Aaaaghhhhhhh!!!! Aaaaaaghh!!!!! Aaaaaaghh!!!!??!!
Ehhhhhnnnnnnn? Ehhhhhhhnnnnn????
Yeeeeeeeee!!!!!!
You see all this, my scream, ehnnn. It’s small oo compared to….
Only God knows where Mr Otedola got his patience from
It is not me ooooi. God must have really blessed him differently with so much bandwidth, incredible patience and love
You see, these are our daughters used to really push us
They know the special place they have in our hearts and will be treating us like boyfriend
They know that it’s only Shakara that we can do. DJ Cuppy knows her father very well, even more than the Mama knows him, and that’s why she tickled him like that, and he replied with the emoji with his hands on his head
I have my own DJ Cuppy. This one will take advantage of me and laugh.
Chantal is a mischievous little somebody.
She will be looking for my trouble and be saying to me – You can’t touch me, I’m your favourite child
And I will be looking at her like mumu.
Unlike Mr Otedola, I used to shout o. I will shout, ‘Chantal, are you crazy?’ Why are you not taking my calls? I will slap you oo
Chantaaaaaaaaallllllll, I will scream, and she won’t answer me
And at her time, she will call. Ehn Joe, how are you, and I will scream, chantaaaaaaaall, why didn’t you pick, and she will say, I was not in a reasonable frame of mind
And I will say ehen? And she will say, ‘Look, Joe, just tell.’ You love me, and stop screaming and I will melt like butter on hot agege bread
I am sure Mr Otedola must have gone thru this phase and don tire
These girls not only have the mumu button but know how to press it
At the Billionaire level, na buy house for London for Cuppy, she asked after not answering for nine hours
For my level, na pay my rent for London after ignoring me for months
For Bayo level na pay for my masters for Abuja after ignoring am for days
These daughters are just little, very pretty and adoring devils
They will look you in ur eyes, hug us, play with your beards, call you ice cream names, taunt you, you will just turn to mumu in their hands
The special bond between father and daughters cannot be explained
Even the greatest scientists in the world cannot decipher it
Our daughters are in control.
Me and chantal had a fight recently and I blocked her. The girl no even care cos she had told me once that she can afford to stay without me, cos she is my child, and I cannot afford to stay without her
So this time, I was determined to be strong. This girl cannot abuse me like this, make I no show am
I will not pay any fucking house rent, I will not pay any fucking masters, I will show her
But every morning, I will ask her mama if she has called you? I will ask her aunt Mayen, has she called you
I will be looking at my phone, wey I block ooo if miracle can happen make I see her chat
Then one day, I saw her chat on IG – Joe, I want to apologise, I’m sorry
It was like I had won the lottery, but I decided to do Shakara and no gree.
Finally, we spoke, and it was more of an admonition from her and a small apology, but more of a reminder to me- Joe, you know you should be more…
Daughters are like small puppies, cute and annoying, but you can’t do without them; they are a necessary evil
So mbok, make una leave Otedola alone with him Cuppy, that is his own mumu button like my chantal is mine and Bayo’s own, his.
Any man wey get daughter will attest to what I am saying
The way they overprotect you, the way they pamper you, the sincere love, the passion, all mixed with an incredible capacity to annoy you while still soothing you, I swear, they are a necessary and very loving evil
To all fathers, I say let’s be like Otedola, who has, over the years, suffered in Cuppys hands and has literally just given up and rolled on his back for her to be twiddling him in joy and laughter
Our daughters are the best blessing God can ever give a man once we learn to brave their annoying tendencies, they are the best balm any man can have in this world.
Chantaaaaaalllll, better don’t annoy me again
Duke of Shomolu
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