Mena and I had a life of adventure. When she passed, I wrote almost daily about our life that people couldn’t get enough
One of my favourites was the day Oro pursued us
Mena was a ‘big girl’ in every sense of the word. She was literally always showcased in City People our own Bella Naija and Instablog of the day and she attended all the hot parties of the time
She was a beauty with unique dentition and carried herself like a gazelle.
She had a smile for everyone making people name her menarayyy
I was a small Shomolu boy who was in his first real job.
No car, earning N16,000 a month, and with no dress sense and very skinny.
But I had a Lion’s heart. Mena was not in my class at all. She lived in a big house in an estate, had her own car and lived a beautiful life
That was the one my eye entered. Everybody said don’t try it, she will chew you to pieces, you can’t afford her, she won’t even look at you.
Me? Akwa Ibom Denzel Washington. Me? I went o
The woman liked me and we started talking and she would keep a seat for me beside her on the staff bus and we will talk from ikoyi to Ogba where she would drop and I would also drop and take Molue back to Shomolu.
I discovered that she liked fish, so I sold my Okada and started taking her to the popular Iya Peju at Alagomeji to buy her fish telling myself that by the time the N14, 000 that I sold the bike for was exhausted, she would have been my girlfriend.
Everybody said No as we grew closer. I wasnt single and as such it was looking ‘one kind’.
But we didnt mind as we pushed. Dont know what drove us despite my status we sha continued
Then she called me. She wanted to go to Whispering Palms in Badagry which had just been opened and was the hottest spot in the land
That was the final test of my seriousness.
I made enquiry and it was N20k a night and i was earning N16k a month
I sat down and analysed my situation. I had chased this girl for two years complete and only succeeded to have been friendzoned
I had sold my Okada on this matter and had jumped molue from Shomolu to Ogba so much that the bus drivers now knew me
Even the security at her Estate also knew me and they would say, madam just drive out or madam dey
No mobile phones so u can imagine me jumping three buses, trekking and hoping on a bike only to hear that madam don go out
I did that for two years and finally, she now wants to break the ice by setting a very romantic place for us to start our journey and a little thing like money would now stop it?
I immediately applied for a soft loan of N60, 000 to be paid back over a one year period.
The loan was approved and i said oya
She said aghhh she was joking o that she knew I cannot afford the place.
Its like someone asking a new entry bank clerk to take her to Marriot for two nights.
I told her to forget about it that i was ready. She asked where I got the money, I said forget about it
So we moved. Hired a cab and went towards badagry
Let me explain the journey.
I first jump small bus to onipanu. From Onipanu, i take Molue to Ojota, drop at Ojota and enter small bus to Ogba and from Ogba take Okada to the Estate
From there, we hired cab to badagry.
Now here is the story. Cos of traffic, we got to badagry around midnight and smark into the waiting arms of the Oro masquerade people
Women are not supposed to see the masquerade and me small akwa ibom man looking even more afraid than Mena
The driver asked us to calm down as he engaged the people
I started crying and mena went under the chair and covered herself with a wrapper
She was laughing at me from under the wrapper – why are u crying, are u not a man?
I said leave me o. In my mind, i was asking myself wetin make me come chase big girl ooo
Finally, the cab driver was able to cut a deal and they asked me to come out and pay my respect
They were nice, asked me to stop crying that we were lucky that they were the advanced party and as such the Masquerade was far.
They escoretd us to the resort, kept Mena totally covered just in case and kept laughing at me for being such a coward
That night, shame catch me and Mena laughed at me till morning
But that was the start of a 22year journey that saw the loss of two children and the birth of beautiful Alvin who is now 17years.
Five years ago, her smile left us. Alvin called me this morning thinking that I wont remember the date and I said –
You know your mother loved you. She fought for you eventhough she didn’t have to fight for you and no matter what in this life, never ever forget her cos she lived for you.
Her last words were – Duke pls take care of Alvin and why are you wearing those stupid shoes to this hospital
Hmmm
Duke of Shomolu
Mena Joseph Edgar was a Banker, entrepreneur and socialist who sadly passed in July 2025.
She is survived by the Duke of Shomolu and Alvin Joseph Edgar