Ruth Osime is a ruthless, take-no-prisoners kind of interviewer
Tomorrow she will be discussing the Homosexual issue on her popular program – Perspective
Her angle would be the women who describe themselves as married to gay men and how they are coping
She wanted me on board and I was keen but talks that spanned over two days culminating in a midnight call last night got me out
Edgar, I don’t want to make you come advocate for gay rights for my programme since it is against the law in Nigeria
But I don’t want to advocate for gay but I want to say that not every marriage we suddenly find say the man na gay na deciet na
She agrees but states categorically that her angle for Saturday is for the ‘poor women who find themselves in those marriages and how they are coping’.
I respectfully agree to be kicked out cos there is no way I will agree that men are villains on this one too
So she will be going with therapists and probably a lawyer, it promises to be a must-watch
But the conversations that we had got me thinking
We seem to be playing the Ostrich game in this country as a vast size of the population is in one kind of same sex relationship or the other
Amongst females, it’s even more prevalent as I can almost confidently say that 3 out of 5 Nigerian women either have had a gay experience or have the thoughts or are already in a same sex relationship or the other.
For the male folks, though not as prevalent as the females, it’s really growing with the Northern region energising the leader with SW and SE playing a very aggressive catch-up.
With this seeming growth, stigmatisation is pulling back.
In fact, it’s more of a fun thing on the female side as it is not as abhorrent on the lesbian side as it is on the male side
At this rate, I can project a repeal of the law against homosexuality in five years.
Whole industries have been taken over, whole segments of society are also being led by same sex practitioners, and the bond amongst them enables cohesion and support.
So the question is how does one feel being of a certain type in an environment that is still very openly abhorrent of the practice despite its underground popularity
My parents are aware, even though they pray about it. My Priest is aware and gives support and I have a lot of support from my siblings and friends
This is a young man who has lived on that side of the road for almost all of his young life
From him, I have learnt of the huge vibrant sub-society that they have built
A subset that includes their own bars, their own places of worship, identified places to work, their own vocabulary, their own mode of identification to the point that they could really live a fulfilled life without coming into mainstream society for anything
The don’t ask, don’t tell mantra made popular by President Clinton seems to be holding sway here in Nigeria as we mostly look the other way and pray that – it is not my own child.
The boldness and the overconfidence of Gen Z have breathed more life into the movement
The young ones don’t care as they live their ‘truth’, thereby oxygenating the movement, if, I can call it that.
So is this article a judgment call?
Far from it, but a wake-up call to the reality of a same sex evolution in an otherwise sexually conservative society.
The need to wake up and smell this coffee now has become very very imperative
Watch Ruth Osime’s Perspective tomorrow on Arise TV by 11am
Come and beat me
Duke of Shomolu
Last modified: July 25, 2025
