Appoint me crisis manager immediately
Suspend all Helicopter flights in and around kogi, Abuja and Akwa Ibom
Infact shut down the Kogi Airspace NOW.
Declare state of emergency in Kogi and replace Gov with rtd Navy to better enforce the Natasha Ban.
Stop watching Porn with immediate effect and have your IT clear your history backlog on all your systems
Send Nollywood Starlets and slay queens to her husband to distract her attention
Work with immigration to explore the possibility of deporting her to Ukraine. Remember, we once tried it with Atiku claiming he was not Nigerian
Ban all sort of skin creams and things that make her beautiful cos that is her power ask Senator Ogunlewe
Look for her University or childhood boyfriend to give us some dirt – nudes, dildos anything cos this wave is growing in strength o
Let us also call a press conference and accuse her of asking Esekwesili to use bad breath to kill us and thank Senator Nwabonyi for foiling that attempt.
Ask her to tender her HIV test result, cos from grapevine, you must have passed that test before you are qualified to be harassed. If she has not done HIV test in the last one year, then there is no way she can be harassed.
We too, lets fly helicopter into Ikot Ekpene and distribute Akpabio labelled condoms. This would forestall a possible recall and strengthen our hold on the constituents
Or shey we shd just go and beg?
Duke of Shomolu
Last modified: April 2, 2025
