Trouble seems to be my middle name these days.
Anytime Chief Obasanjo sees me, he will say – Duke, whose trouble are you looking for this time
Chief Ibori, anytime he introduces me to people, he will say – na dt trouble maker wey they abuse everybody up and down be this
My big aunty Lami Tumaka will also say – my darling trouble maker
And veteran newspaperman Festus Akanbi just called me a troublemaker this early morning
Well, last week, I looked for trouble and found it.
I had jumped on Adetoun’s viral lampooning of Ogun Governor, Dapo Abiodun, on the back of the Anthony Joshua accident
In a satirical twist which was lost on the Governor and his people, I x-rayed the issue and advised that they should have ignored Toun instead of engaging her in a war of words on social media, where she is a terror.
My people, that is how the next day, I saw a Right of Reply sent to me by my brother Bolu, who is a Commissioner in Ogun state
The headline was bold – When Hatred Replaces Reason:Joseph Edgar, Adetoun and the abuse of tragedy
Instantly, I knew trouble had come. I quickly read the story, and the writer, who is Special Adviser on media to the Ogun State Governor, did his very best to take me to the cleaners
The first thing that came to my mind was that Toun herself had just called me to berate me, and now Ogun Governor was fighting me on a matter that I just put my small mouth into.
By evening, the write-up had been carried by major platforms, both traditional and new media
Even Alibaba called to say make I run o
I immediately called my Editor, Davidson, who revealed that he had been ‘battling them since 6am’
My people, I’m weak o. For a small thing, I write na him the whole Ogun State Govt come after me o
He said he had calmed them, but that their anger was plenty
I immediately called Otunba Ashiru, who put me on a three-way call with the Special Adviser. The Special Adviser said, ‘You now have my number, please call me first.” I said, “But why do you yab me like that?” and he replied, “Me too.” I called him a beer parlour communications expert
Well, as that one was simmering down, I wrote another small article on NGX
Small article o on the float crises and the whole market scatter
One Jude, who is an MD there, called me unreasonable in a text. The CIS umbrella body of Stockbrokers had their members call me a serial debtor, and the DG of SEC called and spoke for over 10 minutes
A lot of calls came in, and most of them were about why I was singling out Jude and not others
I explained that he is the MD of the place, and if he didn’t have the power, he should tell us who, so we can pursue the person
I don’t know why people used to get frisky over small write-ups I used to write, which, in some cases, is just me having fun
How can a whole government be so worried over something I wrote on a toilet seat to the extent that they were considering arresting me, a whole orphan?
You people take me too seriously. It’s not hard like that, o
I am just a little poor orphan that has nothing behind him, and when I write, people will be calling a cabinet meeting on my head
It’s not that hard, na.
I am not a troublemaker or just one porn-loving, coke-drinking, man of the people who has too much data at his disposal at any point in time.
Thanks
Duke of Shomolu
Last modified: January 10, 2026
