I woke up this morning one kind. Something pushed me to my finances, and I checked and saw that I was now financially in debt to the tune of N78m
Wow. I’m owing N78m, I screamed. I didn’t know it had climbed so high o, and I went to buy two Mini Coopers in one month
Why did I now go and check, just now that I want to go shopping
Now I will be fearing when I see the prices . Mbok I cannot kill myself jo, I will splurge and enjoy my life
So how did I come about this debt?
I took a huge gamble on the Coffee Table book and borrowed N50m at 35% pa to publish it.
Dropped one of my flats with a forced sale value of N140m as collateral
The bank gave me N45m after taking their charges upfront, meaning that I would be paying back a whopping N15m in interest
Chike thinks I was a fool for taking the Loan after selling pre-order N58m
Needed funds for proof of funds, and Chantal is starting her master’s in the UK with Zara and Alvin leaving this September
So, I could not keep N58m down when I had my children’s education at hand
So now, I have a N78m deficit, and by the time you add my other living costs and other plans, this would grow into N100m very easily
So when people used to ask me for money, and I couldn’t give anything above N100k, you now understand
My net worth for the first time is now less than N200m in assets, but in liquid assets, let’s just say – I can no longer afford a brand new car
So if Agusto wants to rate me, they will give me Bbb and put a caveat: invest at your risk
So should I be worried? Would you be worried if you were in my shoes? Would you panic?
I’m not the least worried cos at any point in time my real asset more than double my debt exposure
What that means is that, push comes to shove, we sell and go back to the village
I’ve sold before, very early in my career
I was owing Habib Bank when I left them. When the wahala was too much, I sold a flat and paid off
Another one was Ecobank. They gave me a credit card and used interest to finish my life. When the calls were becoming like harassment, I sold another flat and waka commot
So I’m not a stranger to debt and know how to manage it
So this N78m debt, what is my plan?
First, I will go shopping today. Spend real good money, enjoy myself, go and watch strippers and then go to the peep hole to see some nudity and then go and eat and come home and sleep.
My recovery is already on track
I covered my cost on Obey and Zik coming out with a tiny N12m shortfall after spending N180m, which is already covered by expected inflows
I have just received 500 copies of my Maddtimes coffee-table book, and less than 50% of that would clear all these fucking debts, and I’ll be good again.
So you see, life is how you see it. I never panic over anything cos no matter what, the sky will not fall
My greatest inspiration in this debt matter is Otedola and the Sahara Boys
The price of diesel went mad one morning and wiped Otedola’s billions off, and he was worth less than the meat seller in Shomolu market
The Sahara Group Boys, one morning during the Abacha era, lost everything and had less than N100, 000 to themselves
But today see both, so why would I now be crying or fall into a panic cos historic debt has hit me. After all, as poor people will say – even Nigeria is owing.
I smile once again as I look at the figures on my Excel sheet and remain excited cos I used to enjoy how the calculation used to show as the figure is dropping as I pay down.
Worst case, I run to AMCON and sell the debt and waka go.
I cannot come and kill myself for small money wey I owe
If the thing bite u too much, come and beat me
Thanks
Duke of Shomolu
Last modified: August 21, 2026
