A lot of you don’t know that I was a political office holder for one day
I was appointed, although verbally, to the advisory board of one of the most lucrative Investment holding parastatals in my state one morning and by evening I was kicked out
Let me give u the gist
The Gubernatorial campaigns in my state were fierce.
I had taken sides and was very vociferous against our opponent
I rained abuse on him almost daily and even called him a bald albino at some point
All this, I was doing from Lagos and leveraging my media reach and power
At the height, I got a call not to come near the State Capital since they could no longer guarantee my safety
I ignored it and dared them to come and beat me in Shomolu, and continued the fight
Then the usual Nigerian wuru wuru entered the matter
Before I knew it, my candidate had decamped; the next thing, he was standing down, and by the time I said Afang, Yellow Man don win and has declared happy hour
I shrugged and went back to my stage plays, vowing not to go home again for anything, knowing full well that I can get all the Afang I needed in Lagos
So you can imagine my surprise when I got a call one cold Saturday morning
I had just finished watching porn when the call came
It was the newly appointed Chairman – Edgar. I’m building an advisory board, and since you have investment banking experience, you should be part of it
Honestly, I thought that we had now matured and were practising politics without bitterness
I quickly agreed, mouthing the usual crap political appointees mouth – I’m ready to serve my state.
He thanked me and dropped the phone
Shey, I for just keep quiet-me ke, keep quiet?
I immediately shot out a broadcast announcing my appointment and swearing to serve our state with all my might
That is how Chairman called again
Edgar, your broadcast is ruffling feathers at State House
Ahhh, help me beg them, oh. Me that I have been reviewing what type of cars would be in my Motorcade and which coat of arms I will be using
Chairman says, I hear it’s from the very top o
I say, please help me beg Mirinda man not to vex na
That all of that must have come from youthful exuberance; I never even saw my principal since he decamped
Chairman said ok but you will have to promise me that you will sheathe the sword
Ahh, that one I cannot do, o. So I will see Mirinda man being funny, and I won’t talk cos I am on the advisory board, not even given a spare key to treasury?
I say, my brother, let me just go quietly before I go and put u in trouble
He quickly agreed, and I was amazed at how quickly he accepted my resignation
Well, that was how I was appointed by 10am and by 4pm the same day I was already on the kerb
Since then, nobody has looked my way, not even as Ambassador to Mexico, with all the danger in that posting for any political posting
Mbok, can anyone pls ask Mirinda man if I have been blacklisted so I know how to move in the coming elections
See as I dey call am Mirinda man; if he come and beat me now, nko?
Na wa
Duke of Shomolu
Last modified: October 5, 2026
